Zig Ziglar's Heartache

Business As Usual?
-Marsha

Through the years, acting as an advertising support person for my husband's business led to much more than computer graphic design. Research, symposiums, reading and more reading were all part of building a foundation for the business. Zig Ziglar was on our 'authors to read' list. Both of us read his books on positive thinking. They not only applied to business but to life.

After losing Molly my need to read has become almost an obsession. Some call it bibliotherapy. I call it a godsend. There is such an isolated lonely feeling that accompanies such a loss. The books have become a comforting friend who understands the pain, the questions and the journey.

While scanning the shelves of the bookstore Zig Ziglar's name popped out at me. What was a book by him doing in the bereavement section? Much to my surprise, Zig had written a book about losing his own daughter. Shocked and surprised, I opened it and began to read.

It is funny how the world often functions according to our tunnel vision. This man lost his daughter many years ago. He stopped writing books on positive thinking for quite awhile as he mourned the loss. He questioned whether he could return to a positive outlook. All the while, I was reading his previous books without a clue.

These excerpts from his book placed that title on my reading list.
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One of Marsha's two daughters daughters (19 years old) was killed in a gun accident in Sept ‘09. She maintains a facebook page titled A New Journey, dedicated to helping grieving parents. She lives with her husband in the Pacific Northwest.

In The Material World

Grief and the spirit...
-by Marsha Abbott
Those experiencing profound grief over the loss of a child often experience the sense that the ’material world’ becomes markedly less significant. Some attribute this to the extreme level of emotions experienced with such a loss. The expression of these emotions puts a ‘halt’ to the focus on all things earthly, and opens their souls and spirits to a heavenly connection; a connection available to everyone who chooses to stop the sounds of the ‘material world’ from drowning out the call of our spiritual link to life ‘beyond’ this 3-dimensional earth.

Once we accept that a ‘light’ can come to us not only when a child dies, but whenever we cultivate the connection, a transition can begin. Our increasingly secular culture sends daily messages that we are only ‘of the earth’. Consequently fewer and fewer people allow the possibility of a heaven and earth connection. If, after death, the energy of our spirit crosses the thin veil to a new dimension (Heaven), then do we reassess our purpose here on earth? Should we be more acutely aware of our connection to those who’ve gone before us?

People intersect with heaven on a daily basis. Often, experiences are related only to those closest to them. Faith in recent history has been ritualized and put into a box. Many faith based institutions relegate dreams, visions, and connections to life beyond this realm as superstition. This philosophy is limiting.

Throughout history there have been those willing to share their glimpse of heaven with the world. Western culture is preoccupied with serving personal pursuits, worshipping not only earthly material things, but the earth itself. Earth worship benefits political factions in search of power and serves to divert the population away from a power much greater than this dimension. Eastern cultures are often much more in tune with what is beyond this earthly world.

The energy of the spirit is a link in a chain, to which we are all connected. This energy is everlasting and worth consideration not only by those who have been struck by immeasurable pain, but by the masses.

One of Marsha's two daughters daughters (19 years old) was killed in a gun accident in Sept ‘09. She maintains a facebook page titled A New Journey, dedicated to helping grieving parents. She lives with her husband in the Pacific Northwest.

Carefree Blogging Takes A Hit

The road makes a sad and unexpected turn....
By Marsha Abbott
Looking back over the last 8 months I’m reminded of the day I decided to start a blog. Filled with ideas about current events, political eruptions, delectable food and drink recipes, northwest travel and weekend escape ideas, I couldn’t wait to set forth. Whether anybody read it or not, didn’t matter. Weary of ‘reality T.V.’ and dreading the upcoming dark northwest winter, starting a blog was the perfect idea for evening boob tube avoidance.

I set forth with great ideas and couldn’t wait to tell my husband that we had to ‘get out there’ and grab a bigger sample of life because I had to find something to write about. While planning that first adventure I decided to write my first article on the Health Care bill and how it would affect a variety of Americans, from low income to business owners. What? I think I was delirious. Next idea. How about sharing a great margarita recipe? Yes, my creative juices were beginning to flow.

Then on a beautiful sunny Sunday morning the phone rang. I received news that my daughter had been killed. A nightmare descended into my home and into our lives. A horribly black nightmare.

Life stopped for me. It stood still. Adventures, laughter, music, travel and recipes meant nothing. That phone call forever altered my world, my future, and my sense of joy. In the months of privately grieving for my darling Molly, I started a journal. That journal will forever be private, but what emerged from those writings was a desire to share my story with others. I have met others traveling this heartbreaking road and all of us seek help and comfort. I read everything I could get my hands on. I talked to our Rector. I learned about life after death and communicating with those who have gone before us. I searched. Then I decided to refocused my blog and begin to share parts of this journey.

There have been many vacant ‘grief’ months on this blog, where I could NOT write anything. The place of darkness was vast and deep. But I’m back, sharing the thoughts and musings of a mother and family who have had to alter their view of the American dream. I look at life with hope and joy, but with a clear window into the suffering of others. I am often overcome with tears from out of the blue and I doubt that will ever change. I understand irreparable loss. I am the mother whom the other mothers never want to be. I represent their greatest fear. Because of that, I’ve experienced the love and compassion of women who try to put themselves in my place. I pray they never actually have to experience it. I give thanks for God’s compassion shown through them.

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One of Marsha's two daughters daughters (19 years old) was killed in a gun accident in Sept ‘09. She maintains a facebook page titled A New Journey, dedicated to helping grieving parents. She lives with her husband in the Pacific Northwest.